year end me-me

year-ender me-me (thanks kitty!)

1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
* chronicle my wanderlusting (as in, kina-reer!)
* visit the states (and not just one, mind u!)
* travel alone
* spend time with my grandma
* get published in LA!
* get to know and spend time with an ex and his family


2. Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I have a list for 2006…. And hell yeah, I’m keeping it!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
yep. An aunt and some close friends (congrats, tuwa and pao!)

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Acquaintances and a few good people. Rest in Peace….

5. What countries did you visit?
The US. (see previous posts where I was)

6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
a high paying job and more travelling! :-)

7. What dates from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
The months of October and November. That’s when I traveled and got to visit the East Coast, saw friends, met up with old loves and yes, had a FABULOUS time amidst tears, disappointments, and lotsa moolah spending.


8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Learning and still learning. Loving.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not getting enough sleep.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Severe depression. Thank goodness for friends, writing and the postal service!

11. What was the best thing you bought?
A ticket to New York.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Lotsa people! Kudos to the crew of the West Coast --- River, Gel, Ghenier, Jeff, Harold, Don, Abie, BJ, Dave, Josol, Jason, the Funside gang, my cuzins Justin, Bobby, Jackie, Rico for showing me a grand time…. and the East Coast peeps --- Melissa and her sis Lani, Mitzi, Dave, Osbourne, Hazel, Cha, Tomoko, Lucy, Geraldo, Alvin and sweet Babar :-) (to those whose names I forgot, thank you too…)

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
*pass*

14. Where did most of your money go?
Kape.inom.lakwatsa.banko.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Visiting New York.

16. What song will always remind you of 2005?
- The Way You Look Tonight (classic Ella Fitzgerald version!)
- Mr. Brightside – The Killers
- Chewing Gum – Annie’s Anniemal
- Hung Up –Madonna’s Confessions on the Dance Floor
- Akin Ka Na Lang - Itchyworms’ Noon Time Show
(this is the best album na OPM so far)

17. Compared to this time last year, you are:
cynical.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
I wish I had more time to travel. I also wish I took more care of my heart.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Worrying.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Spent it with my family. All by ourselves (my dad was sick eh) it was a good Christmas tho

22. Did you fall in love in 2005?
I wish!

23. How many one-night stands?
*pass*

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Family Guy, Scrubs, House, Sex and The City reruns, Whose Line is It Anyway?

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Sadly…but hate is such a strong word….

26. What was the best book you read?
How to be Good by Nick Hornby

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
The Killers and Brit Rock… Annie…. Hip Underground bars in New York’s East Village

28. What did you want and get?
I wanted to travel and I was able to travel.
I wanted to see my ex and I did.
I wanted to know the meaning of life. I still don’t know it.
Two out of three isn’t bad. 

29. What did you want and not get?
How to course through my life without getting hurt.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
RENT the Movie.

31. What did you do on your birthday. And how old were you?
painted pots with my cousin and aunt. Talked to my ex’s grandma. Went out with my cousin in Hollywood and Highlands for a night of fun. EARLY breakfast at an all-night diner later on. Great way to spend my 25th year!

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
loads and loads of moolah to spend. More time in New York.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
Style meets substance.

34. What kept you sane?
Writing….letters, postcards,emails. Etc. Phone calls to friends, designing. Coffee and yosi. Good conversations and lotsa ranting. Great friends.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Steven Strait (he looks like the guy I’m crushing on)

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Political instability in the Philippines.

37. Who did you miss?
my family. Kittykat, Mary, Jac, the peeps from college. Some more people.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Can’t really say. This year was about re-connections.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005:
”In a mad world, only the mad are sane” – Akira Kurosawa
Tama si Kits ---“Sex isn’t life. But life’s impossible without it.”

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
”alone again, naturally.“ 

funkygirl and groovychick

funkygirl and groovychick
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Reunited!??!!! pic taken last time we were drunk (hahaha) --- specifically, a few weeks ago.

To a friendship that will outlast petty sh*t, catfights (meeow!), guyz and boy problems, and other distractions in life! Long live kitty+bunnie forever :-)

salamat sa iyong pag-intindi at sa iyong pagiging tunay na kaibigan. :-)

sweet misery

You wake up to the heat. For the past few hours, the heat is just exhausting. You wonder if this is another sign of the apocalypse.

You want to douse yourself with cold water real bad.

You drown yourself in music yet the OPMs you play only reminds you of your loss. The sweet sentimentality just adds to the melancholy you can't overcome. What did they say about losing the one you love?

Time travel seems farfetched, but you wish it so dearly right now.

*blink*

Walking through the mall --- Cellphones are everywhere yet there's no one to call. The place looks busy but you know nobody's buying. Why then is there a rush?

You look around to try to recognize a familiar face, yet sadly there is none. How bizaare it is to call this place home but you know no one. You are the outsider. You see things from an observer's view, and you can do nothing but sigh.

Dinner with a good friend. He provides the familiarity you seek (aside from family of course) and you welcome the settling calm. The conversation is a bit clumsy, but you don't feel any unease. The company you seek is here. How you wish everything is as simple as his progression in life. Then again, nothing is simple.

Hush, your mind reprimands. Of course it is. All you need is direction. Somebody give me a clue.

The night beckons you to be imaginative. You try and try but you end up short. What is it about provincial air that makes you think twice about things?

Unless you get out, you will become a statistic. Welcome to the land of stereotypes, where creativity is nil and your imagination runs dry.

10 things

10 things that bring me joy (tagged by kittykat)

[01] great friendships
[02] good coffee and conversations
[03] special times with loved ones
[04] love letters, postcards, mushy souvenirs
[05] family moments
[06] travels, road trips and (mis)adventures
[07] time alone with a really good book
[08] music trippin’
[09] great loves
[10] the future


ytagged!

cheers, tears and a lotta breakage

Happy christmas to the peeps.

A lot of love, a few tears shed, and yes, some wistfulness has made my christmas --- it's always good to know that amidst all the melodrama you can be assured of the love that comes from true friendship.

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sometimes surprises come in small packages. In this case, really sweet messages coming from nowhere. Thank you!

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New year is so close... i wonder if i'll have enough time to start my plans...

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To everybody whose numbers i don't have (and whose messages i haven't had the chance to return) Merry christmas to you and your family!

And this is where it all begins...

and this is where it all begins...
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

In celebration of friendships and the new year, i look back to some of the cool ones i've managed to keep all these years despite time, weird scenarios, petty fights and all that jazz. Cheers to the trio that made it through all this... in good times and bad, in drinking and binging, in great loves and terrible heartaches, we are still here sonic and kittee... :-)

cleaning the closet

I found your postcard today.

Your words are written so beautifully, and even as I read it I was close to tears. You always had that effect on me. I wonder if you still have this in you.

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Last hurrahs earlier this a.m. Bibingcrepes, some chilling at St. Loius, last-minute rundowns and hellos at Big Sky. The conversation was great, and the mood was light. Despite my lack of sleep I mingled. Connections, small world! I feel like the world is conspiring and trying to tell me something… haunts from the past? I hear new names, find new secrets. It’s interesting how things connect…

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I saw your pic and I smile. I wonder how you would feel if I sent it to you. Would you miss me like I miss you?

catching up

The past is literally haunting me.

Everywhere i go i see pieces of you. Every nook and cranny, every haunt we went to, every person we connected with. It's harder to deal with your ghost that way.

I realize every so often why i left.

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Drinks with gal pals makes the singleton life a lot more bearable. Free flowing beer, lovely cocktails. The room starts to spin slowly. I love this heady feeling. It keeps the thoughts at bay.

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The new year beckons. I'll start living again by then. Happy holidays y'all.

christmas week

Tis the season for rushed shopping, heavy traffic (isn't that always the case?) and yes, the commercialism that has become the holiday spirit.

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The other day:

Spent the day chilling at Makati, reconnecting with old contacts. Had a bitchfest with cohort Mary amidst the Landmark goods --- apparently, SM isn't the one who has it all --- Landmark has some surprisingly good (and BAD) goods that's just worth poring over.

Dinner with Nons at his apartment for some tuna and tomato linguine. Yummy! Had fun learning the rudiments of poker (look out world! Haha!) Chilled at Fiamma later on, mingling with the beautiful people of Manila. Twas crowded, brightly lit and yes, heady. I wonder how people do this thing every week.

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Yesterday:

Not all plans really go through. Last minute changes resulted to some pretty interesting scenarios, like walking the streets of Makati, downing about 3-4 coffees, hailing a cab in vain for two hours, listening to a crappy band, eating at mini stop in the early a.m. (and bumping into old acquaintances) and chilling at Big Sky till the sun came up. And i thought my night was gonna ba wasted. Made new friends though. Looking forward to the xmas party...

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Today:

The endless wait continues. What supposed to be was lunch is now turning out to be an early dinner. I am tired of waiting. Also, my flight got bumped off and now i'm stranded in the metro till xmas day. Argh. This is turning out to be some christmas week. Luckily i will be adopted on christmas eve by good friend Jackie and her family (yey!) At least there's still something good about this holiday...

heat wave

I never really got around to walking around the metro, and today i realize there is a reason why i don't. It is soooo BLOODY HOT.

Still, the nuances of not being able to get a cab is why i had to walk 3 blocks to the MRT. Haay. It's really annoying the hell out of me why there are not decent pavements along the roads to encourage people to walk (Makati is excluded of course, though i wish they had more of that). The ride to Makati is less than pleasant, with people from all walks of life coming in and out of the train, bringing with them the smells and odors that when combined is the wors thing your nose can ever sniff.

Note: I have had my share of bizaare rides, and i do not want to come off as a snotty botch, but hell, it was REALLY SMELLY earlier, and the fact that people are too damn close to each other just irritates the hell out of me.

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I'm not much of a Makati fan, but i do appreciate their long shaded walkways and very efficient a/cs. Plus, they have a lot of bookstores which i can lose myself in and not worry about where to "park".

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I am lost in the scheming of moolah-making. Argh. I really wish i can do something productive and can give me some decent spending money. Lord, you know what i want!
:-P

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On a lighter note, kudos to Jac and Zap for the wonderful day yesterday! I truly enjoyed myself, despite the setback of not getting any sleep prior to them picking me up for Tagaytay. I love the long drive, the fab brunch at Antonio's (wonderful place, Jac, we really must go there again!), the wonderful (and very sweet, very touching) gift and of course, the endless picture-taking. :-) Will post them pics up soon, not to worry!

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saturday

sonic's bday
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

happy birthday sonic! / poker night and sushi galore / the gang's all here!!! / reminiscing college days... / inuman na! / it's great to be back / tv marathons, drinking spree, foodies / it's all in the chips! / "so, how's work?" / "never again!" / cheers to friends / "kulang na lang si Peanut, si Mona at si Mike!" / it's one for the logbook / older, wiser? / "ang tanda na natin!" / happy holidays....

looking up?

Wow -- the moment you decide to just let things happen instead of trying to guide them, they really start happening. Putting your strong sense of drive into neutral takes a lot of self-control, but right now it's the best thing to do. Try getting in touch with the cosmic flow -- the moods of those around you as well as your own feelings and intuition -- without being attached to the outcome. Quite soon, some magic begins to occur.

Talk about getting what you wish for. Lord,I asked to see him, the other him, not a scary physical manifestation of my morbid past!!! Next time i should be more specific...

I guess wishing does work, but you just gotta be more detailed.

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I have been aimlessly walking around Katipunan in hopes to find some sort of inspiration. So far, none comes to mind. I am just procrastinating going home and sleeping. *sigh* Where has my life gone?

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I think i need a nap. Or some pills to keep me happy. Or both.

check lists

My friend Jac once mentioned her to-do list to me, that is, things she needs to do before she turns 26, which mentions not only practical ideas (cooking, etc.) but the more interesting tasks too (kissing a stranger in a strange land).

Makes me wonder, just what other thigs do i want to do before i turn a year older? hmmm.... In the spirit of check lists, i've decided to make a mental notes of things i still have to do which i want to accomplish for the next year, ranging from the practical to the bizaare:

- lose weight for the feb trip
- fix my portfolio (again)
- have an out of country trip (asia)
- kiss a stranger in a strange land
- get a fabulous (if not better) job
- start a trust fund
- sponsor a kid / join an NGO
- find a new "look"
- date an "opposite"
- go back to the east coast! :-P
- get myself published in the US
- get a MAC powerbook!!!

Ah well, the countdown to the next year begins. Wonder how this will turn out...

the hump day

nope, it's not what you think (though, at times, i wish it were :-p)

Today is hump day, a wednesday (wrong time zone, hence the thursday dated entry) and well, midweek always gives me a mix of excited panic and hope, for some reason. It's the time when you "finalize" weekend plans, start smiling because in a few days' time it will be a weekend again, and yes, take it easy from work or play. or both.

For me, however, hump day gave me a chance to go about the old neighborhood and reminisce (oh dear). I walked around the streets where we used to walk, check out the places (grocery store, internet shop, 711) we used to hang out and drink my cup of joe from where we usually ended up each night. *sigh*

Incidentally, he was the one who oriented me into this whole "hump day" scenario.

Still, it was no sad day. More like a "what did i do wrong this time?" and "how do i get out of this and move to the next not-so-distant-future?" kind of thinking, a first in a while for me... i came up with no answers, yes, but that is merely temporary. For now i'm content to know that i've past the rut stage.

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Walked a couple more kilometers before deciding to raid the grocery for some much needed food finds and head home for some R&R. Nothing cheers you up better than crawling into a nice sofa and watch reruns of Sex & the City while munching on some comfort food.

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I wonder often if life can ever be like that of Carrie and her friends. Seeing NY just makes me want to go there and be lost in the city. I try doing it here but everything is just so familiar it's so hard to get lost.

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I try not to get too cynical though. Living vicariously through another's burgeoning relationship and another's interesting moments, like tonight's cab ride, keeps me in check that life still has a few surprises in store and i should look out for that. :-P

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strange encounters

i woke up last night to the soft tapping of feet. i didn't think much of it until i sa wthat it was a RAT.

WTF!?!!!

of course, after that, sleeping was the last thing on my mind.

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Now i'm up after a few hours of troubled sleeping, and trying to make sense of my day. My wanderlust calls me, but my wallet holds me back. oh, the torture.

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I want to hear from him today. God, it that possible? :-P maybe i can chalk it up to another strange encounter.

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back in the loop

Makati is bustling and the hustle begins.

I am trapped in my internet bubble, too busy in my attempt to re-connect with everybody. IM doesn't exactly qualify as such.

Had loads of fun hanging with Kitty and Vince during their brainstorming session earlier. Made me realize work can be fun, and now i miss it. It doesn't help that working results to money to blow and spend, whcih i dearly miss at this point.

Had a mini-meeting with my old boss, who in turn gave me a beacon of light to my demise of living in the province. Unfortunately, i would have to put my US trip on hold if i should do so... Then again, i'll be working....here... hehehhe....

I think God has a plan for me. I just wish he'd let me in on it. :-P

coffee, cake and conversation

pao_N_lette
Originally uploaded by bunnie_lette.

Met up with Jolography author and dear friend Pao for coffee and cake at UP's Chocolate Kiss. It's so good to catch up and see what's been happening for the last 6 months... and yes, i missed the kahlua butter cake! yummmy....

Thinking Outside the Box Office

(reposted article By Xeni Jardin)

Director Steven Soderbergh talks about the copyright cops, the remixing underground, and why he'll debut his new movie on DVD, cable, and in theaters all at once.

When Steven Soderbergh releases his next film on January 27, it will have not only the critics squawking, but Hollywood studio execs, too. Bubble, an all-digital thriller, is set in an Ohio doll factory, and all of the actors are completely unknown. But that's not even the interesting part. The movie goes out to theaters, DVD, and high-definition cable TV - all on the same day. It's an experiment that threatens to uproot the film industry's long-standing "release window" formula, which staggers a picture's release on various platforms to maximize profits. Wired caught up with Soderbergh, director of sex, lies, and videotape, Traffic, and Ocean's Eleven, while he was in Los Angeles shooting The Good German, with George Clooney and Cate Blanchett.



WIRED: Why did you decide to release Bubble in all formats at once?

SODERBERGH: Name any big-title movie that's come out in the last four years. It has been available in all formats on the day of release. It's called piracy. Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings, Ocean's Eleven, and Ocean's Twelve - I saw them on Canal Street on opening day. Simultaneous release is already here. We're just trying to gain control over it.

WIRED: So this is a way to combat piracy?

SODERBERGH: It can be. Warner Bros. has talked about going out with low-cost DVDs simultaneously in China because piracy is so huge there. It will be a while before bigger movies go out in all formats; in five years, everything will.

WIRED: Will people keep going to theaters?

SODERBERGH: Always. You're going to see attendance plateau a bit, but it's still the number one date destination. That's never going away.
WIRED: Have you been to the movies recently?

SODERBERGH: I tried to go to a theater yesterday, but the fire alarm went off. The theater experience isn't always pleasant. Theater owners need to address that. There are often problems with projection; tickets and concessions are expensive; theaters aren't always clean; people talk during the movie. They're making it easy for people to stay home.

WIRED: What's the reaction in Hollywood to your release experiment?

SODERBERGH: People are waiting to see what happens. A movie that costs only $1.6 million doesn't have to be a cultural event to turn a profit.

WIRED: What's the biggest impact technology is having on filmmaking?

SODERBERGH: When the changeover from film to digital happens in theaters in five or 10 years, you're going to see name filmmakers self-distributing. Another thing that really excites me: I'd like to do multiple versions of the same film. I often do very radical cuts of my own films just to experiment, shake things up, and see if anything comes of it. I think it would be really interesting to have a movie out in release and then, just a few weeks later say, "Here's version 2.0, recut, rescored." The other version is still out there - people can see either or both. For instance, right now I know I could do two very different versions of The Good German.

WIRED: Have you ever used BitTorrent or other software to download movies?

SODERBERGH: No. I know about it, but I haven't even downloaded music. I'm behind the curve.

WIRED: Should hardware manufacturers be obligated to build copy protection into their devices?

SODERBERGH: It's a tricky question. I don't think somebody who creates something should have their rights violated. Yet we have a culture in which creating something like [Danger Mouse's] The Grey Album can get you thrown in jail. That's sad. It's an astonishing, amazing piece of work that should be heard.

WIRED: Have you thought about making a mash-up?

SODERBERGH: I have ideas like that - video mash-ups. Some of them I've done privately. But there's no way for them to be seen legally. I wish we could come up with a system that allowed someone to do a Grey Album without having to pay millions of dollars for music rights. A system in which rights holders share profits of a new piece of work and people can access it without breaking the law.

WIRED: Give me one idea for a video mash-up.

SODERBERGH: I was channel surfing the other night and Gus Van Sant's Psycho was on. It would be fascinating to do a mash-up of Gus' version with Hitchcock's version, because the whole thing with Gus' version was that he duplicated the original shot by shot.

WIRED: I'd watch that!

SODERBERGH: Yeah! So right now, I could do that at home and give it to a friend, just as something for them to watch on a Friday night. But we don't live in a world where that can be made commercially available. So it goes underground. And underground is just a sexier word for illegal. It's frustrating.

WIRED: You shot Bubble with the same kind of high-end digital cinema cameras that George Lucas used for Revenge of the Sith, but the results couldn't be more different. Instead of flashy effects, there's a stripped-down naturalism.

SODERBERGH: We wanted to do site-specific films. You hear that term used for other art forms, but not for cinema. The writer and I come up with a basic premise, go to a location, and the people fill it up. We interview people, incorporate their stories, try to make it as organic as possible. The cameras make that possible. You can shoot using available light. I sometimes ran two or three cameras at a time. In Full Frontal and K Street, I learned to take advantage of the mobility that digital provides. With Bubble, I wanted to go in the opposite direction and emphasize stillness. Because there isn't film running through the camera, you get an even more pronounced stillness. That's why you don't see much camera movement in the movie, just a lot of cuts.

WIRED: With all this technology available, do you think the quality of movies is better today than 30 years ago?

SODERBERGH: I think it will be better. As technology gives filmmakers more freedom, you'll see them producing work that is more unique, less beholden to the mainstream film template. That means rethinking the economics. But I'm always willing to gamble.

WIRED: How are you gambling with Bubble?

SODERBERGH: There are risks, and then there are risks. I'm not working in a coal mine. Still, everybody involved did it for scale pay, and everyone owns a piece of the profits.

WIRED: Sounds like the financial model for a startup.

SODERBERGH: Exactly. I'd be thrilled if the model works well enough for me to do that all the time.

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